Personal Reflection

Sunday, March 21, 2010

I’ve been feeling so good lately ... can hardly believe it. Yesterday I went out for a drive, just to get out of the house. I had all four windows down a bit with the tunes turned up ... what a great feeling. The weather has been so lovely here lately too.

I’ve been doing a bit more reflecting these days. It’s kind of hard to imagine my body is sick with stage four cancer. Right now it’s not getting worse or better but it’s still there. Part of me wants to think, I’m back to normal but ... I’m not. I’m always thinking of that next scan and what it could show. What is the cancer in my liver doing to me today? The weird part is that I don’t feel it, so I don’t know. On the other hand I’m so fortunate not to be having any major side effects from the cancer or chemo... like no pain. I wake up thinking ... ok how do I feel today? ... any changes? Then I go about doing things and then all of a sudden I stop and think ... I have cancer ... can’t be true. It just doesn’t seem to be something I can totally wrap my head around ... even after all these years.

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